A Divine Appointment

As a christian believer, I believe in what we call, divine appointments. Basically what this is, is that we believe God has a reason for everything, and sometimes we are in a specific place at a specific time, for a very specific reason. I want to share with you what happened to me today.

As I have already shared with all of you, I have a dad who is a homeless man, here in edmonton. The scary thing about having a loved one who is homeless, is that you don't know when the next time your gonna see them will be.(If you even see them again). This is really hard on me because I know personally, just how dangerous living on the streets really is. There's alot of phyco's out there. Alot of crazy crack heads who don't care 'bout nuthin', and alot of skitzo's too.

Anyhoo, I havn't seen my dad for over a year now. A few weeks ago, my sister-in-law mentioned to me that she heard on the radio that a homeless man named Peter had died in a bus shelter downtown. My heart neraly jumped out of my throat, for I know that my dad often uses bus shelters to sleep in and warm up in. That day that I heard about that, I was very upset, and I went and locked myself in my room, and I started praying. Begging would be more like it. I started begging God that he would save my daddy from dying before he was ready to. Because as a believer in God, I also believe that you gotta be right with God before you die, or you will suffer in hell for an eternity. And hell is...well..scary. Its a place of extreme lonliness and pain, not just physically, like the cartoon depict it, but it's a place where God's presence does not exist. There is no protection there. There is no door out. And the thought of my daddy going there deeply distreesses me. So I was begging.

Well, today I had an essay due for english, so I didn't leave school until around 2:30. I usually leave at 1pm. Then as I walked up to my bus stop, the bus went right past me, so I decided to take a detour to city centre mall. Which is something I hardly EVER do. Then, while inthe mall, I decided to go to Winners and find myself a new hoodie or yoga pants, because Iam losing the baby weight now and my clothes are getting too big. I looked and looked and couldn't bring myself to buy anything in the end, and I was thinking to myself,"Geeze, what a waste of time." So I went to catch the bus.

Then I got off at Raya's daycare, and suddenly decided to go buy a couple Papa burgers for supper. Which is, again, something I never do. Then I went to go get Raya. And we started walking the 2 blocks home. And LO AND BEHOLD, there is my dad's ex-girlfriend. Standing there waiting for her grandson to get off the school bus. I couldn't believe it!! I went up to her and said hello and asked her if she'd seen my dad lately. And she told me YES!!!!! He had just called her the night before and had left his phone number with her and his address.
He was living in Gunn, Alberta, and was in a treatment program for his drinking!!! PRAISE THE LORD!! I was so happy, I almost started crying. She took me to her place where she gave me his address and phone number. Turns out she lives only a block away from me! And my dad visits her when he does come to the city.

I jus want to say, "Thank you God, that my daddy didn't die when he was on the street. Thank you for keeping him safe and thank you so much for making sure that I found out that he is doing better than just all right. I DO believe(becvause I choose to believe) that you love my dad just as much as I do and that you want better things for him than what he had going for himself here. Thank you for giving him a SAFE place to stay!"

My First Memory

I never grew up with my biological mom and dad. I was only with them for the first 3 years of my life. But during those 3 years, I grew to love them. Even though they drank and fought with each other, I still grew to love them. I still do. I always have. No matter what stories I heard about them growing up, I always loved them. The stories I heard were always bad and I have no doubt that they were all true, but they are my mommy and daddy. Nothing will ever change that.

One of my very first memories are of me living in a mobile home(trailer). I remember there was a bedroom at the end of the hallway and thats where me and my mom and dad all slept. They slept in a big bed, and I slept in a little bed under a window.  I remember once I had gone to find them because I noticed that they weren't around, so I went to the bedroom to look for them, and there they were, on the big bed, naked. My dad was on top, and I remember him looking back at me, over his shoulder and he had an really annoyed look on his face, which was weird because he always had a smile on his face when he talked to me. I remember a little warning bell going off in my mind, because he wasm't smiling. Well, the he grabbed a rolled up sock or something and threw it right at me, almost hitting me and he hissed;"Get outta here Starla!".

For some reason this struck me as funny. Probably because I knew I was doing something he didn't want me to do, so I started laughing, and I slid the door shut and went back to the living room. Away from them.

Since I turned 16 I've been able to meet my mom and dad again. I found that I still had a deep love for both of them. That love is something that will never change. I don't care what they've done or havn't done. They are my mommy and daddy and I will always love them dearly. I can say that I am really thankful I didn't grow up with them only because I wouldn't be who Iam today if they had raised me. And I like me. But Iam glad they had me and I am proud to look like them and share certain personality traits as them. For instance, my dad is funny and he's very kind. He always has a positive attitude and he's loved by the people who know him. And my mom, well she's strong. Very strong. She's also very smart. I feel privilidged to be the product of their love.