Today we (the Dream Centre) went to a seniors lunch to sing for them, and to share what the Lord has done in our lives, and right now I feel so inspired. Like seriously. I just need to write about this. God has called each and every single woman that is here, to Himself. I remember well, when He called me, and I also remember the struggle deep with-in me, whether I was going to follow Him or not.
I recall the thoughts and feelings that were going on inside of me. I remember standing at that fork in the road, and before me was 2 choices that were very clear to me at the time. Road one was to keep surviving. Get a roof over my head, and get some kind of job that would be stupid enough to hire a 6 month pregnant woman. OR choice number 2. To live. To give up the things in my life that were holding me back from suceeding, like drinking, and smoking, and gambling, and men. Yes, men. And I remember the feeling of slight panic as I thought of a life without pink cider coolers and sex. Now, a little over a year and a half later, after chosing to live, Iam truely happy with the decision I made.
Life is so full of blessing each and every single day. Waking up to a beautiful, chubby, little brown baby is pure heaven, no matter if its 5:45AM. And walking into school every morning, and having familiar faces bidding me a good morning makes me feel important, and accepted. As I ride to and from school I see out the window, the very same ghetto neighbourhood that I once dwelt in, and used to sleep in those very same alleys, my heart aches for the day when I can someday return to that neighbourhood, and bring it some hope. Everytime I come home with baby Raya after a full days worth of knowledge in my head, and hear greetings from my friends welcoming me home, I again feel so loved for and cared for that I forget how tired I really am, and spend some time with them, laughing, joking, and bonding. As I sit down at my supper table, wherever it may be at the moment, and bow my head, I have so many things to be thankful for, and I let God know about it in my heart. I get to wear a smile all day, and really mean it. It is by no means forced, and I truely feel so blessed to be alive today, and the days to come. Iam happy. And thats all because of the changes God has made inside of me. My attitude, my perspective, and my feelings have all been affected by the supernatural being that is the Lord Jesus.
Thank you Lord. Never stop.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Dorm Life?
Oh My Gosh. There was a fire in the building I was living in. A pretty bad one. I was the lucky one to discover the patio on fire, and try to put it out, but 2 margerine containers full of water was not enough to put it out, unfortunately. The fire trucks had to be called and we were all evacuated. By the time the fire was put out, it had spread into our building, and eaten away our 3rd floor celiing.
When we were finally allowed back in, we were told to pack enough stuff for the next 5 days, and so we did. 5 outfits for me, 5 outfits for Raya. All my make-up, a pair of heels, my favorite tolietries(including 2 of my favorite purfumes!), and a bunch of random stuff, like a case full of nail polish, and flannel pajama's. hahaha Flannel pajama's in summertime? What the "h" was I thinking? hahaa
Its been 2 weeks now, and we havn't been able to go back in. I was under the impression that we would be able to back in and grab more stuff if we needed to, but apparently its against the law for us to go in the building until its all un-contaminated, and clean and fixed. Its so funny how little you can actually live on.
All 16 of us girls have been living out of our suitcases since the fire. Some of us have gone shopping for a few things here and there(tampons, toothbrushes, maybe the odd hoodie from walmart) but we are managing to survive. I guess I'm lucky, because I get to leave the dorm rooms all day while I go to school, and I take my time coming back thats for sure. I left my computer in my building, so I mostly use the computer at school, during school hours.
My baby hates this place. We just moved into different rooms again today, and she's miserable. She needs some blanky's, and some snacks, and maybe a dolly to hold. I only have a few small toys for her here, and I didnt think of things like blankets, and teddy bears to bring for her.
One thing I did buy since the fire was a new camera. Being able to take pic's and look at them brings me joy. Iam very happy if I have a camera in my hand. Us girls have been trying to make the best out of the situation, and have had movie nights together, and we had a spa night, where I painted some of the girls nails with fancy art deco designs. And my best friends are here too, going through the same thing with me, so it doesn't seem that bad.
Iam currently going to start looking for a place of my own. I think its finally time for me leave the Dream Centre and let somebody take my place here, who needs to change their lives for the better. I dont know where I'd be if it wasn't for the Dream Centre. Seriously. Iam so not the same person I was when I first walked throught those doors. Thank the Lord above, that He changed me from the inside out.
Oh, there also isn't t.v's here either, so it leaves lots of time for writing, and reading, and unfortunately, doing homework. BLAH!!!
When we were finally allowed back in, we were told to pack enough stuff for the next 5 days, and so we did. 5 outfits for me, 5 outfits for Raya. All my make-up, a pair of heels, my favorite tolietries(including 2 of my favorite purfumes!), and a bunch of random stuff, like a case full of nail polish, and flannel pajama's. hahaha Flannel pajama's in summertime? What the "h" was I thinking? hahaa
Its been 2 weeks now, and we havn't been able to go back in. I was under the impression that we would be able to back in and grab more stuff if we needed to, but apparently its against the law for us to go in the building until its all un-contaminated, and clean and fixed. Its so funny how little you can actually live on.
All 16 of us girls have been living out of our suitcases since the fire. Some of us have gone shopping for a few things here and there(tampons, toothbrushes, maybe the odd hoodie from walmart) but we are managing to survive. I guess I'm lucky, because I get to leave the dorm rooms all day while I go to school, and I take my time coming back thats for sure. I left my computer in my building, so I mostly use the computer at school, during school hours.
My baby hates this place. We just moved into different rooms again today, and she's miserable. She needs some blanky's, and some snacks, and maybe a dolly to hold. I only have a few small toys for her here, and I didnt think of things like blankets, and teddy bears to bring for her.
One thing I did buy since the fire was a new camera. Being able to take pic's and look at them brings me joy. Iam very happy if I have a camera in my hand. Us girls have been trying to make the best out of the situation, and have had movie nights together, and we had a spa night, where I painted some of the girls nails with fancy art deco designs. And my best friends are here too, going through the same thing with me, so it doesn't seem that bad.
Iam currently going to start looking for a place of my own. I think its finally time for me leave the Dream Centre and let somebody take my place here, who needs to change their lives for the better. I dont know where I'd be if it wasn't for the Dream Centre. Seriously. Iam so not the same person I was when I first walked throught those doors. Thank the Lord above, that He changed me from the inside out.
Oh, there also isn't t.v's here either, so it leaves lots of time for writing, and reading, and unfortunately, doing homework. BLAH!!!
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