Today we (the Dream Centre) went to a seniors lunch to sing for them, and to share what the Lord has done in our lives, and right now I feel so inspired. Like seriously. I just need to write about this. God has called each and every single woman that is here, to Himself. I remember well, when He called me, and I also remember the struggle deep with-in me, whether I was going to follow Him or not.
I recall the thoughts and feelings that were going on inside of me. I remember standing at that fork in the road, and before me was 2 choices that were very clear to me at the time. Road one was to keep surviving. Get a roof over my head, and get some kind of job that would be stupid enough to hire a 6 month pregnant woman. OR choice number 2. To live. To give up the things in my life that were holding me back from suceeding, like drinking, and smoking, and gambling, and men. Yes, men. And I remember the feeling of slight panic as I thought of a life without pink cider coolers and sex. Now, a little over a year and a half later, after chosing to live, Iam truely happy with the decision I made.
Life is so full of blessing each and every single day. Waking up to a beautiful, chubby, little brown baby is pure heaven, no matter if its 5:45AM. And walking into school every morning, and having familiar faces bidding me a good morning makes me feel important, and accepted. As I ride to and from school I see out the window, the very same ghetto neighbourhood that I once dwelt in, and used to sleep in those very same alleys, my heart aches for the day when I can someday return to that neighbourhood, and bring it some hope. Everytime I come home with baby Raya after a full days worth of knowledge in my head, and hear greetings from my friends welcoming me home, I again feel so loved for and cared for that I forget how tired I really am, and spend some time with them, laughing, joking, and bonding. As I sit down at my supper table, wherever it may be at the moment, and bow my head, I have so many things to be thankful for, and I let God know about it in my heart. I get to wear a smile all day, and really mean it. It is by no means forced, and I truely feel so blessed to be alive today, and the days to come. Iam happy. And thats all because of the changes God has made inside of me. My attitude, my perspective, and my feelings have all been affected by the supernatural being that is the Lord Jesus.
Thank you Lord. Never stop.
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