Today we (the Dream Centre) went to a seniors lunch to sing for them, and to share what the Lord has done in our lives, and right now I feel so inspired. Like seriously. I just need to write about this. God has called each and every single woman that is here, to Himself. I remember well, when He called me, and I also remember the struggle deep with-in me, whether I was going to follow Him or not.
I recall the thoughts and feelings that were going on inside of me. I remember standing at that fork in the road, and before me was 2 choices that were very clear to me at the time. Road one was to keep surviving. Get a roof over my head, and get some kind of job that would be stupid enough to hire a 6 month pregnant woman. OR choice number 2. To live. To give up the things in my life that were holding me back from suceeding, like drinking, and smoking, and gambling, and men. Yes, men. And I remember the feeling of slight panic as I thought of a life without pink cider coolers and sex. Now, a little over a year and a half later, after chosing to live, Iam truely happy with the decision I made.
Life is so full of blessing each and every single day. Waking up to a beautiful, chubby, little brown baby is pure heaven, no matter if its 5:45AM. And walking into school every morning, and having familiar faces bidding me a good morning makes me feel important, and accepted. As I ride to and from school I see out the window, the very same ghetto neighbourhood that I once dwelt in, and used to sleep in those very same alleys, my heart aches for the day when I can someday return to that neighbourhood, and bring it some hope. Everytime I come home with baby Raya after a full days worth of knowledge in my head, and hear greetings from my friends welcoming me home, I again feel so loved for and cared for that I forget how tired I really am, and spend some time with them, laughing, joking, and bonding. As I sit down at my supper table, wherever it may be at the moment, and bow my head, I have so many things to be thankful for, and I let God know about it in my heart. I get to wear a smile all day, and really mean it. It is by no means forced, and I truely feel so blessed to be alive today, and the days to come. Iam happy. And thats all because of the changes God has made inside of me. My attitude, my perspective, and my feelings have all been affected by the supernatural being that is the Lord Jesus.
Thank you Lord. Never stop.
Excerpts from my real life living. The cold hard truth about everything. Reality blog.
Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label changes. Show all posts
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
A Drug Addict and Drunk turned Christian
For the majority of my adult life I was addicted to meth and alcohol. I always felt like that I needed one or the other to be "happy". When I was sober, I was actually very shy, and very awkward around people, especially people I didn't know. I found that if I had a few drinks in me, I was alot more social, and I didn't seem to care if everyone around me was accepting me or not. In fact, sometimes when I got drunk, I didnt want people to accept me. I wanted to fight. I shake my head in embarrassment now, looking back, at all the times I would pick fights with nice people, just because I wasn't thinking straight. The next day I'd either have to watch my self, that I didn't run into the same people the next day and risk getting into another fight, or I'd have to go back, all red-faced and humbled and make my apology. Sheesh. Iam amazed that I still have a nice face, after all the fist fights I've been in. And as for the meth, well, it didn't make me fight. It made me feel....busy. I was constantly on the go, going nowhere in particular.
I find it amazing that that was not that long ago! This past year and a half has been amazing! God has truely set me free from my addiction to meth and booze. Which is really amazing. I am now going to college and pursuing a degree in buisness OR getting my teaching degree. I still havn't decided. I am enjoying learning more about God and His ways of doing things in life. I learn something new every day that I want to. I've been reunited with all my children(4 of them) since I've cleaned up and I have a brand new daughter that I am raising on my own. Its truely amazing what God can do if you let HIM!!! I seriously want to tell the world of all these changes. Wether its encouraging people to pray for their loved ones to turn to God, or whether its encouraging drug addicts to give their lives and hearts over to Jesus and let him restore their lives wholly and completly, I know I NEED to do something!!!! HEAR ME PEOPLE!!!
GOD IS ALIVE AND WELL!!
CALL ON HIM! HE WILL ANSWER!!!!!
I find it amazing that that was not that long ago! This past year and a half has been amazing! God has truely set me free from my addiction to meth and booze. Which is really amazing. I am now going to college and pursuing a degree in buisness OR getting my teaching degree. I still havn't decided. I am enjoying learning more about God and His ways of doing things in life. I learn something new every day that I want to. I've been reunited with all my children(4 of them) since I've cleaned up and I have a brand new daughter that I am raising on my own. Its truely amazing what God can do if you let HIM!!! I seriously want to tell the world of all these changes. Wether its encouraging people to pray for their loved ones to turn to God, or whether its encouraging drug addicts to give their lives and hearts over to Jesus and let him restore their lives wholly and completly, I know I NEED to do something!!!! HEAR ME PEOPLE!!!
GOD IS ALIVE AND WELL!!
CALL ON HIM! HE WILL ANSWER!!!!!
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